automatic stop

i was running through the mall at almost light speed. not quite light speed that’s an exaggeration but it was quite fast. and i kept running into closed doors and i was trapped. beige walls and lots of nothingness. the mall is dark now.

it really just feels so loud and i’m not sure how to quiet it down. i mean honestly i’m not even sure if it’s loud. maybe i’m just too quiet so everything is loud in comparison.

i feel like i’m running from something and i’m not entirely sure what. my body feels it too. there’s so much on my mind, so much to do, and it’s never ending and that’s okay i suppose. i just need to distract myself.

pure anxiety

really, i want to nap. i care about nothing else right now. i want a summer storm. i want a blue evening. there’s cuts everywhere. i feel like i can’t talk to anyone really, i feel like no one is listening or something. i feel like i am not real but if i cut myself i’ll bleed?

what a dark day